In my last post, I highlighted a unique business opportunity for people who want to put sex tapes of themselves up onto the Internet and make money off the desperate individuals who pay to watch such activities. I know that some of you have already started work on your masterpieces and will soon be raking it in. It's not that I haven't considered it. My husband is game, my body is in pretty good shape and I am keen to get paid for doing nothing (well, practically nothing). My main problems are these: the lighting isn't very good in my front room, so that either means buying special lighting or going to stay in a hotel to film the action at $200 a pop. I'm still trying to figure it all out. Do I need to style my hair before I film myself getting down to it, or will no one be looking at my hair, or at least, not the hair on top of my head? Which leads to more problems, like pubic hairstyles. Which ones are in and which ones are out these days, when trends change so fast? And what about protecting my privacy? Maybe I should simply wear a paper bag over my head? Also, do I need to disguise my voice so that no one will recognise me (like say, my mum or my daughter's teacher), even through the paper bag? So far, I can do a pretty good Scottish and South American and a passable Korean.
It's a minefield, I tell you. I'm beginning to think the less glamourous world of internet cam whoring may be a better bet for me. For those of you who are still scratching your heads at how to get started in this lucrative field, help is at hand. Just go here and all will be revealed in five easy steps.
And for those of you not interested in either of these job opportunities, here's another another brilliant Armand Van Helden video, which really cracks me up. By the way, do any of you happen to know of a video where a nerdy woman is surrounded by three gorgeous men? If you do, let me know.
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
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16 comments:
I think all the real money is in girl on girl...
Emma, thank you so much for this great career idea. I can pick and choose between sharing my sex tapes, or Internet cam whoring. All this time, I've been having sex for fun. Who knew I could be earning tens of dollars every month?! Or getting men to buy me the classics of French literature from Amazon.com simply for having fake orgasms on webcam?
The best line ever, from watchme.com:
"What's the point in doing it if nobody's watching?"
Brilliant.
if you need any help, you know on how to do it an all that, just ask me, send me them first videos and i'll let you know if they need redoing just as soon as i've, you know, gone over em properly
Jesus!
I've only been gone a few days and you're taping yourself on the Internet. I MUST be a better MHAH groupie...
And now you have a "Haden" all worshipful and whatnot.
You slut :)
You're the one in the green bikini, right?
I like when he rubs his own belly.
Kristin...Yes, good point but I don't know anyone who is game for that. I was hoping to take it from the MILF angle, since my husband looks barely legal.
la fille mariee...thanks. I like to keep this blog informative as well as entertaining.
haden...I will keep your very generous offer in mind.
crankmama...Yes, I try to keep busy darling. And Haden seems an amusing enough type, he's from Leeds you know.
Cesca...Yeah, I am the one in the green bikini. How'd ya guess??
Oh the Joys...Yeah he is an absolute scream.
My husband works in the adult entertainment buisness, and MILF stuff does very well.
I always find that the sex tape idea seems good at the time, but when you play it back you see how ridiculous you actually look. Although pleasurable, sex is a rather ridiculous looking act when you think about it.
i may or may not have, in the past, on more than one occasion, dreamed i was armand van heldon in one of his clips
Too funny! Loved Baltimore, btw.The warf area's the best in seafood short of the Flagship where I did externship.
turboslut...I've never made a sex tape and I think I could do it easily enough because I'm an exhibitionist but I really would not want to watch it and see my ass jiggling and the rest.
kiki...I do believe you share that fantasy with most of the heterosexual population. I think his vids are kind of cheesy but sexy too, he pulls it off.
babsbitchin...Yeah, Baltimore gets a bad rap but a lot of it is really funky, kind of like NYC probably was in the sixties, hipster dudes and little groovy shops.
If I could get some of that tattoo covering makeup, I'd be in business. Use the sex to get the Christmas gifts- I'm sure Tim would be down for that.
Sort of agree with Haden. Make the tape then figure out what you want to do with it from there. If it sucks, you can always keep it to play when you need a laugh.
;)
You can make money without taking your pants off. I do it!!! I know others who do it too, and some girls have made so much that they put their hubbies to work too :)
Sweetsassysamantha...I went on your blog and I see you mean you can make money doing phone sex. I dunno if I'm up for that, makes me feel a bit queasy, all those old guys beating off down the line. Or is it quite good fun?
It's definitely lucrative. I was reading an article about cam girls here in Australia, a while back, and a lot of them were senior high school students, who earned quit a bit through 'gifts' for services rendered (hehe).
I'm with you on the male nerd & babe phenomenon. The only video clip that comes close, kind of, was the Weather Girls years ago, with It's Raining Men, them being surrounded by Chippendale stripper look-alike men.
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