Cat on Heat

Well, my friend Daisy and I have escaped to New York, and have so far had groovy times. Wow, New Yorkers are so friendly. Last night a Jesuit priest and his chum bought us drinks all night. Who knew Catholics were so generous in their pursuit of spreading God's love through alcohol?

We are staying at Daisy's sister Annabelle's apartment, who is leaving today for a stint working in Uganda. Daisy and I have to take two cats back to Baltimore on the bus (in carriers obviously). Gabby is Annabelle's cat and Smokey is Daisy's (Annabelle was minding her). The downside of cats, apart from the fact that I am allergic to them, is that six month year old Smokey has come on heat.

So during the four hours of fitful sleep I had on the sofa last night, Smokey was wailing and moaning, like, well exactly like a bitch on heat.

As the cat books say, "The queen may vocalize excessively, sometimes crying in a loud and plaintive tone. She may roll on her back, becoming more docile and solicitous of petting or attention. She may groom herself more, frequently licking her vulva. During peak estrual behavior, the queen presents her hindquarters, elevating her hips by leaning on her forepaws with tail quivering. This behavior becomes more and more insistent. The estrual queen may display this behavior toward her owners, who may at first find it amusing. After several sleepless nights, however, they may be less entertained."

After constantly trying to stop her rubbing against my legs and squirting stuff all over me, I am definately no longer entertained. When Daisy gets Smokey back to Baltimore she will get her spayed.

Last night we went to a really good comedy show. We sat away from the stage because the stand-ups humiliated anyone sitting too close. One comedian picked up someone's drink, stared at it with disgust and said, "That is the gayest drink I have ever seen. What is it, a dirty martini? That is so gay. The only gayer drink than that is sperm."

Which I thought was hilarious.

Later we tried to get into a club, but I had left my photo ID back at Annabelle's so they wouldn't let me in (some bizarre new NY law). So we hung out at a bar all night with all manner of charming characters. And now I can hardly keep my eyes open but I am sure I will be back in the swing of it after an eggs benedict.

Daisy barfed out of the window of the cab on the way home last night. The driver was so sweet and handed her a tissue and said, "Why don't you stick your fingers down your throat. That'll get it all out." Then he gave her a plastic bag, bless his cotton socks.

I love New York so much. But it's too exciting for me. If I lived here I would definately be out every night. And my wallet would be very depleted indeed and my liver very pickled. Still, I LOVE NY!!