The Foxyegghead

This + a brain = The Foxyegghead

Well now, here's something you might not know. That women now make up 57 per cent of university entrants, and outnumber men in every subject, including maths and engineering. That two thirds of medical students are now women. That if current trends continue, most doctors will be female by 2012.

Why should that concern anyone? Well, according to Boris Johnson, a UK journalist, the point is this: an increasingly educated female population will lead to tons of non-graduate men as well as graduate females being left on the shelf. As an added factor, 40 per cent of female graduates born in 1970 will remain childless, and the trend is getting worse.

In the past, women have chosen a mate at an equal or superior intelligence level to themselves. A recent study shows that if a man's IQ rises by 16 points, his chances of marrying increase by 35 per cent; if a woman's IQ rises by 16 points, her chances of getting hitched decline by the same amount.

As a result of the same instinct — female desire to procreate with their intellectual equals — the huge increase in female university enrolments is leading to a rise in what the sociologists call assortative mating, which basically means that since female graduates won't marry non-graduates, an increasing number of non-graduate males and graduate females will never marry.

Well now, while that is certainly an interesting perspective, I don't think it takes into account this basic point: Women like to give it a bit of lip service about how they want a man with wonderful personality traits and intelligence and sensitivity etc. But in my humble opinion, while intelligence in a mate is important to most women, isn't the greatest factor in choosing a mate whether he earns a good to fantastic salary? Thinking about all the men I have ever known, the ones who got laid the most were wealthy and/or good looking. It really had very little to do with their intelligence, conversational skills or anything else.

One could in fact argue that good looks and finances in choosing a mate are essential in keeping the species going in the most cave-woman type way. Good looks and a good build are an indicator of health and good genes. Also, women value wealth in a mate, not necessarily because they are money grabbing little bitches, but because they want their kids to have a good standard of living and education.

Or, put another way, would anyone have had children with someone as ugly as Donald Trump without his fortune? Answer: no.

But that doesn't help me from wishing that society was different. Okay, maybe I am prejudiced here, but why is life so unfair for us women? Why are at least half of all women nice looking, whereas with men the percentage is maybe, what, five per cent? For God's sake, we are forced to choose between eye candy and intelligence. But, my God, think of the future, the future of cloning and genetic engineering!

In the future (alas, probably not in my life time) there will be genetically engineered males who are droolingly good looking, and who, when they open their mouths, are witty, intelligent and engaging. They will have the bodies of Greek Gods combined with the wit of Jerry Seinfeld (another point: would someone as dorky looking as Jerry have stolen his hot young wife away from her husband, without the lure of his millions? Answer: probably not).

Because, let's face it, as well as there not being many good looking men about, aren't they invariably stupid? Case in point: has anyone every heard the gorgeous David Beckham talk, or rather, try to talk? It's a little bit embarassing, to put it mildly. Why oh why are good looking men often rather dim? Is it because a handsome man doesn't have to develop his personality because his looks open doors for him? Who knows, but the intelligent/good looking man combo is as rare as George Bush uttering an intelligible sentence.

A Foxymoron is that achingly gorgeous male who, unfortunately, has only air whistling about inside his head. But think of the hybrid that could be created. The Foxyegghead, by a miracle of modern science, would bring intelligence and looks together in one irresistible package.

Okay, I'm going to close my eyes now and dream of that perfect future, when the world will be overrun with Foxyeggheads....aaaah...a bit of drool has just hit my keyboard.