Christine Ruther - a craving for Walnut Whips drove her into the arms of crime
In the heist of a sweet shop called Minges and Son (FOR REAL!) police in Cincinnati recently followed a helpful trail of candy and discarded wrappers that the half-witted thieves had discarded, leading them directly to the suspects.
Nineteen year old Christine Ruther had her 7-week-old daughter with her when she and three others broke into Peter Minges & Son candy store on Thursday. They are accused of taking about $400 (£203) worth of sweets.
They reportedly used the baby's pushchair to transport their loot away from Minges. The group was arrested a few blocks away. This story made me cry with laughter. Until I remembered I'd had a similar brush with the law when I was fifteen and had a Saturday job in a fancy schmanzy chocolate store in Hampstead High Street. The chocs were all hand made in the back of the shop and chocolate ran out of pipes a la Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. It was a fantastic lark. There was just one problem with the job. I was a greedy pig and the fumes of chocolate went to my head. I used to wear a big anorak to work and stuff it full of these yummy chocolates before I left for home. And one day I overstuffed the coat and, if memory serves me correctly, left a trail of chocolates behind me all the way down the street. I believe that was the reason I was 'let go', but it might simply have been that I ate my weight in chocolates every Saturday, so even though they were only paying me something like 14 pounds a day they were losing money hand over fist!
I don't suppose any of you will admit to any behavior more stupid than that, will you?
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29 comments:
There is something magical about a sweet shop called "Minges". Now that would be a fun alternative to Willy Wonka.
What a sweet tooth you had! Forgive me for asking, but do you think a man could have bribed you with chocolate to have sex with him? I suspect that's how the Caro-Magnons seduced the Neanderthal girls, using meat instead of chocolate.
LOL, a chocolate addiction is extremely powerful, and will drive a sane person to the outer limits of sanity... I do not remember doing anything like that, but I do remember eating myself sick at a birthday party when I was 11, the girl's parents owned the local corner store, and there were fantastic amounts of candy at that party. I gorged myself, and was sick for hours afterward, as I was not used to sweets at all. This was very funny! I cant beleive they were able to stuff $400 worth of candy into a baby carriage. LOL.
"Stupider behavior?" Does high school count?
I've just spent the evening with someone who, after plying me with chocolate bars then started eating profiter rolls on toast with cream.
In spite of the above strategy, I managed to keep my knickers up.
There was that time I licked chocolate off the Guatemalan hooker's tits, before the knife fight, but your story is far funnier.
There is a book I had through my childhood, a book of Fables. One story that was my particular favourite was the story about the greedy boy putting his fat hand into a hazelnut jar. He grabbed so many hazelnuts that when he tried to take his hand out - it would not budge.
The picture was of this pudgy, white Mamma's boy with curly locks sobbing with his hand stuck inside the jar.
The story continued that a man came along and whispered to the boy, "If you let go of some hazelnuts and take less, your hand will come out of the jar."
Even when I was seven I felt that was a pretty suck trade off. But it sticks with me as I would always hate to be caught out as being greedy.
The worst thing I've done when I was employed was steal ten bucks from the cash register when I was 20. All of us girls who worked there did it at one stage or another.
luka....I believe they get away with it because the yanks don't know what a minge is. Correct me if I'm wrong?
gorilla bananas.....I suspect I could have been won over as long as they were Belgian (the chocs not the man)
karen...I can't beleive they were able to stuff $400 worth of candy into a baby carriage. I'm trying to work out if the baby was in the baby carriage and they just poured the sweets on top of him and his head was sticking out of a mountain of candy. I think we deserve to be told!
VE..."Stupider behavior?" Does high school count?
come on now, don't be coy, what did you do, you naughty boy?
Tickersoid...
I am a chocolate freak but I can't understand how profiteroles on toast with cream would work. Sounds gross. Although weirdly enough, Nutella on toast or frankly, Nutella anywhere does the trick.
Rocco Tool...
There was that time I licked chocolate off the Guatemalan hooker's tits, before the knife fight, but your story is far funnier.
I just hope that knife didn't land anywhere near your privates and you were Bobitted! Sounds like a groovy night though!
sparsely kate...
yeah, I'm with you. I don't mind being a greedy pig I just don't like being found out with chocs rolling out the back of my anorak.
Here in the United States of Fat there used to be a candy bar called Mars. It was about 2 inches wide and very flat and had nougat in it and almonds embedded in the top layer of chocolate. (this is not the black-wrappered Mars that you can buy in Europe btw)
I developed such a lust for them that I would hitchhike to the mall just to steal them since I didn't think my parents would give me $136.00 a week for candy.
One day I got caught and was politely told to put it back. I did. The split SECOND I became an adult I went looking for them and they no longer make them. BECAUSE LIFE SUCKS.
how fancy was this chocolate shop really? i mean...was it $2 to use the toilet?
I have to admit I always far too much of a conscience to crim. Plus I was an out-and-out coward. the worst I ever did was steal some stickers from a friends desk at school. My heist lasted about 2 minutes because I couldn't live with the idea of being a thief and promptly put the stickers back. A great train robber I ain't!
hehe I don't know which story I like more the Minge one or yours :-)
You know, it makes a little warm feeling in my chest to know that, as I approach the big 40, just the knowledge that somewhere out there is a shop called Minges has me giggling and chuckling like a 12 yr old school kid.
I spent 7 years working at a mental hospital and I'd occasionally borrow a patient just to take round to a friends house to freak said friend out.
I always took them back though, I'm not a bad person.
No madness that I care to admit to, but I went round the Cadbury factory a couple of years ago. The all-pervading sickly smell of chocolate made my feel quite queazy and headachey all day and I didnt partake of any of the free chocolate as a result.
ha ha ha! I had the exact same thing. I worked in a posh chocolate/cafe shop where we served real melted hot chocolates and hand made belgian chocs. Our manager was fairly savvy and said on our first few saturdays that we could eat what we liked, so after a few weeks we couldn't bear even the smell of chocolate. I think I have her to thank for now never craving chocolate in the way I hear people do, although I haven't gone off it entirely... For some reason I am addicted to Kinda Buenos. I eat at least 1-2 a day, sometimes 4, which is hardly quality.
I'm sure I've done much dumber things than that, but just offhand I can't think of a good example. I have to confess, if I worked in a chocolate shop like the one you described I'd eat my weight in chocolate, too.
Wait, they no longer make Mars bars? What?! Holy Hell, I didn't know that!!!!
suzy....There truly is no justice in the world. But now you are an adult don't you prefer hand made Swiss truffles, I know I do.
Kara... Unforunately I don't recall much about the toilet or whether it was hand crafted out of chocolate.
Steve...
I have to admit I always far too much of a conscience to crime.
I am the total opposite. What puts me off is prison. I would much rather die or sleep with the Hoff than do time.
As for Mars Bars Suzy is just talking about when she was a kid they made Mars Bars differently than the way they are today. Of course Mars Bars still exist just not the original ones. please don't panic.
Conortje...
they are very similar stories although I am better looking than the lady in the Minge heist.
Inchy...
I'd occasionally borrow a patient just to take round to a friends house to freak said friend out.
Hilarious! I hope you never did it while a friend was tripping on acid though. They would have been seriously confused.
having my cake...
Actually I recall that the all-pervading sickly smell of chocolate made my feel quite queazy and headachey in the shop, but I still couldn't resist nicking the chocs!
Peach...
I think I was angry at the choc shop manager for being so poncey. I mean, would you believe they objected to me giving free hand outs to my mates when they came in! I told the manager I was just giving out testers but they didn't see my point. The great chocolate robbery was pure revenge.
*sigh* i wish i worked in a choc-shop
Somehow I don't think this was Christine's first chcolate heist. That's the face of a career candy thief.
When I was very young, in the days when they used to deliver milk to the suburbs (in bottles) I used to get up early, grab our two huge boxer dogs and my billy-cart, then go round and nick the milk off our neighbours. Fifty or sixty bottles a day. I have no idea why...
I am a savoury girl. But there are times when I need a fistful of chocolate in my mouth asap. By the choc-stealing lady's photo, I believe it may not have been the first time she's stolen sweets to eat.
Inchy: Hahahahah, borrow a mental patient to freak out a friend. Two laughs in one day.
My work here is done.
A friend had a temp job at Paynes Poppets in Croydon.
Had to sort out duff sweets from good ones. Ate so many with his workmate that they were both ill and then ended up having a sweet fight with each other. Sacked by lunchtime.
For a personal stupid story come and visit, Emma. My post on Zulu 7.
mars...if you worked in a chocolate shop you'd be fat as a sausage so don't wish too hard.
fingers...crime is fun, plain and simple, even if it has no point, so I can understand you nicking the milk bottles just for kicks.
Kathryn...
By the choc-stealing lady's photo, I believe it may not have been the first time she's stolen sweets to eat.
I believe prison will be a good intervention for her addiction.
sparsely kate/inchy...
Inchy makes you laugh...and you have a connection. If only you two could be lovers. Alas. Reminds me of that Van Halen song:
It's got what it takes
So tell me why can't this be love?
this is a real modern tragedy akin to Romeo and Juliet!!
electro-kevin...
I am proud to say I've never been sacked the first day. I think my record is about two weeks.
Would you mind if I tagged you for a meme? Anyway, I did.
Emma - Kate and I also share the same birthday. The Gods are mocking us.
Chocolate makes me lose control, too. I used to work in Sainsburys' Bakery where I would daily stuff my face full of eclairs and caramel squares, crouching under the counter.
Oh yes, I've been far more naughty. And if you read my blog for any period of time, you'll know how.
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