Hi everyone!! I always have several balls in the air and at the moment I am working on a book proposal on Funny Sexual Disaster Stories.
Now, some of them will be my own sexual disasters including:
The man who wore children's pajamas and bit me all over
The flatmate who used to have sex through clingfilm
If you have any hilarious dating or sex stories do please send your stuff to emmakcontact@[remove]yahoo.com
Now, the other aspect I need help with is the title. I need a kiss ass title that is obscene, catchy and sums up the theme of the book. I thought of Tickling the G-Spot, The Funny Side of Sex, but I feel that doesn't er, quite hit the spot.
So I am launching a Bad Sex Book Title Competition which will run until Thursday at 12.00 EST. The winner of the best book title will win my eternal devotion, some nude pictures of myself emailed to them* and some copies of the book.
Please send me your titles! I am bracing myself.
Emma
x
*this is a baldfaced lie I'm afraid
23 comments:
Now that should be entertaining! I wish I had some outrageous story to share there. I can't believe I don't in fact...I'm going to have to think back...
i will probably send you something if my life actually settles down enough to type it.
Hmmm, so much to choose from .... all my sexual experiences have been embarrassing ....
Oh, Lord, I think I can come up with something for you. Yes, as a matter of fact, I'm sure of it.
Title: When Bad Sex Happens to Good People
I'll sit this one out.
As you know, I already have the Oral Sex Light AND the ET Finger Light.
They saw me through Earth Hour!
VE...oh come on darling, I'm sure you've had some bad experiences if you think hard enough. I can keep you anonymous!
compulsively yours....I think you did send me something about a crooked penis once but I'd appreciate anythinge similarly funny.
jford...go on send me something hilarious.
moi...that title as usual is genius m'lady.
MJ....I have pretty much ruined both the Oral Sex Light and the ET finger light during Earth Hour where I put it into various dark places. I don't know if people are going to want them used.
How about (Cum And) Gone In 60 Seconds...?
I'll have a think and see what else I can come up with.
My first suggestion is: "He did it with his socks on!"
(That's not good, is it?)
The Bad Sex Guide?...But I like Moi's title.
I'm pondering bad sex...
Sx
omg i could go into great detail about that penis it was terrible!
goood idea, give me a few days and i will come up with something, i know i have plenty of great stories about crappy rolls in the hay.
'Would You Even Bother If It Didn't Feel So Good...'
"Did I shave My Legs For This?"
i wish i didn't have any stories to share...i'll email you a couple
Title: You want me to do WHAT??
Oh ho! You want bad...check out my post "The Champion". I think that should about cover it! Ewww.
How about, "If You Tell Anyone, I'll Deny It" or "It's No Better With the Lights Off" or "I'm Not Laughing At You...Just Your Penis".
Title: Making Love Laughs
and the "Love" bit is striked out. stupid blogger wont let me add the code so you can see it.
or same thing except change "Making" to "Make"
and no need to send me nudies :) i'm perfectly fine with the eternal gratitude and a free book :D
Arrggh... this is hard!!!
No this isn't a title suggestion.
Sx
I have always had good luck with books like these that have numbers in the title. It's also great cause you know when your done! The last one is vague, but I like it.
1001 Nights of Horrible Sex
365 Reasons Not To Have Sex or the complete guide to staying celibate!
1000 Ways Not to Have Sex
Red Lights and Blue Nights
Good luck! You'd be great at this!
In is not enough
Despite being a blatant Goddess, it has been fairly sporadic in recent years. Consequently I always try to make the best of a bad job.
Titles! :
"Actually, that's my belly button"
"Different strokes..."
steve
How about (Cum And) Gone In 60 Seconds...?
Wonderful!! I will send you enough books to build a tree house!
Gorilla Bananas...
My first suggestion is: "He did it with his socks on!"
Oh I think it's pretty good!
compulsively yours....
send me a story that will make my toes curl!
fingers...
'Would You Even Bother If It Didn't Feel So Good...'
lol ... that is brilliant
Jaime...
"Did I shave My Legs For This?"
most excellent, oh bugger, I don't think I can even choose a winner, you're all winners
Jules...
Title: You want me to do WHAT??
lol!!
I've said that one too many times. I attract perverts like a magnet attracts iron filings.
otherworldlyone...
I'll check out your post!
How about, "If You Tell Anyone, I'll Deny It" or "It's No Better With the Lights Off" or "I'm Not Laughing At You...Just Your Penis".
I love them all.
Media Junkie ...
Okay I am now eternally your humble servant!
scarlet-blue...
How's your illustrated guide How To Dunk Eggs coming along?
Beverly Hamilton Wenham....brilliant!!
The numbers thing is fabulous. A photo of my labia should now be winging its way into your in-box.
[joke]
Another mother! cool blog been browsing it here and there.
Just wanted to say hi and pass along this site. its a custom
search for free stuff and deals. with the way the economy is
and all its pretty nice. esp. if you have kids!
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